16 Oct How to Become an Insider

Dear Westwood Community,

My friend Pat Luna taught me this clever trick: when you’re with a group and aren’t sure whether you’ve quite reached the status of “insider” yet, one of the easiest ways to solidify your belonging is to invite someone else in. As far as they’ll be concerned, you’ve always been there; your role in welcoming others knits you into the fabric of the community.

Pat has used this tactic to great success, building coalitions for justice and inclusion in the United Methodist Church. She’s a lay person and leader in the church, living in the Florida panhandle. This week, she’s using it to help organize churches and leaders in the Florida Conferences as they work to recover from hurricanes.

One of my favorite parts of this simple invitational technique is that it communicates value, builds connection, and strengthens community.

Certainly, we’ve all seen and experienced times when people have been excluded–the conversation circle closes to shut someone out. This can happen intentionally or accidentally, motivated by prejudices or insecurities. It feels awful to be shut out or rejected. It can be devastating when it severs relationships with people we love.

Last month, my heart was filled with tender, joyful hope during our first gatherings of Found Family. This project, which connects younger LGBTQ+ people in our church with parent and grandparent aged “found family” from our congregation, felt like a balm for so many wounds. It was a holy gift, hearing LGBTQ+ siblings in our congregation share some of their tender stories, and getting to receive them with love. It was such an affirmation to know attention and care from older members of our congregation are welcomed, and can be a blessing.

We have a wondrous gift to give: invitation into (or deeper into) a community that is centered on grace. That recognizes the image of God in every person, and that understands we are each counted as beloved.

I want to encourage you to practice sharing this welcome–in small or large ways. You can invite someone outside of our community to come to worship with us. Or, when you’re here, you can invite someone you don’t know into conversation; even someone who has been here a long time might not know your circle of friends.

All of which is to say: I hope you’ll be able to join us for the Fall Festival this Sunday. The chili cookoff and dessert bake-off are always rich with delicious food. Even better, there will be so many chances to introduce yourself to someone you don’t know, or invite someone new into your circle of friends. It’s one of my favorite ways to become an insider to grace-filled living.

grace and peace,

Pastor Molly